Code – July 2015

“A JavaScript developer walks into a bar. By the time they go to order, the bar is abandoned and out-of-date.”

“Anyone who attempts to generate random numbers by deterministic means is, of course, living in a state of sin” – John von Neumann

“Poorly formed abstractions, regardless of paradigm (functional, procedural, OOP, actor, term rewriting) result in bad code”

“The good news is: Anything is possible on your computer. The bad news is: Nothing is easy” – Ted Nelson

“Just pushed a single commit with message ‘Fixed typo in comment’ and now everything is broken.”

“Clearly this downtime is unacceptable, but look at the bright side: we got a great interview question out of this failure!”

“You likely have to get management approval for a $500 expense … but you can call a 1 hour meeting with 20 people and no one notices.”

“The days are long, but the decades are short unless you’re writing javascript in which case both days and decades are NaN.”

“We spent 18 months migrating from a monolith to micro services. Result: Github gets paid for more private repos and find/replace is harder.”

“I don’t want to alarm anyone, but all the passwords escaped again. It’s all very technical, and I’m just as shocked as you.”


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